Hurry up, Recovery.

I’ve learned a lot over the past year and some change that I’ve been in eating disorder recovery. And I’ve learned that patience is required to get better. I start moving in the right direction, and in an instant, I’m swept away by Ana and her promises of the perfect life, if only I am […]

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How shopping for a dietitian is like dating

My dietitian and I were together for just under a year, having recently broken up. She was the best dietitian I’ve ever had. We shared so much life, dark and scary moments as well as lots of victories. Everything was wonderful. At first, Kristen and I had an arranged relationship when she was assigned to […]

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the power of a photo in recovery

I really don’t want to publish this post. But if I want to be open about what anorexia recovery looks like, it includes this. One photo almost took me down… Roommate and I discovered that we were dressed exactly alike on Sunday night, thought it was funny (like how people who live together start to […]

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How I learned to eat again

I have been learning intuitive eating from the best. She eats freely, enjoying what she wants when she wants in the quantity that is perfectly satisfying. She knows what foods she likes and what foods she doesn’t. She is unafraid to take big bites and lick her fingers. She uses all five of her senses […]

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My body, an heirloom

Sonalee Rashatwar, a sex therapist and fat activist, was a guest on Christy Harrison’s (and my favorite) podcast, Food Psych, recently (episode 180, check it out). I was listening along, it was all very interesting, when Sonalee says: I consider my body as an heirloom. Have you ever thought of your body as a family […]

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Jesse’s Girl: Support in Recovery

So, the song goes, “I wish that I had Jessie’s girl,” because some dude is lusting after his friend’s woman. This post isn’t so much about that. In my head that song is more like other girls singing, “I wish that I was Jesse’s Girl” because let me tell you, my man is the good […]

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Want to #feelallthefeels? Try this…

Have you ever realized when you say, “I feel fat,” that can’t possibly be true? In daytime treatment, at nearly every meal, this conversation took place: Therapist: How do you feel? Client: I feel fat. Therapist: Fat is not a feeling. How do you feel? Client (in their head): As a person with anorexia… I […]

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Game Changer

“Success or failure can only be measured according to self-imposed goals.” Landis, R. B. (2013). Studying engineering: A road map to a rewarding career. Los Angeles, CA: Discovery Press) 3 Game Changing Conclusions: Whether you succeed or fail is decided by YOU. Other people – your spouse, parents, kids, boss, friends – do NOT decide whether […]

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Reckless Love

TRIGGER WARNING: eating disorder behavior in detail At a meal in residential, I placed my napkin in my lap as I was accustomed to doing. The staff person at my table said, “Peggy, no napkins in laps, please.” Innocently and ignorantly, I asked, “What, why?” truly not having a clue why this was a rule. […]

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