Ana’s Reason 3.

Series: Under the Surface – Ana’s 13 Reasons Why A series of posts uncovering what is really beneath my anorexia and depression. Reason 1: Genetic Temperament Traits Reason 2: Inheritance Reason 3: My parents’ marriage. And divorce. And remarriage. To each other. MAKE A DECISION. These people couldn’t decide if they wanted to be together or not. Marriage – Attempt 1 (1975-1986) In 1975, they got married on October 11th. As far as I remember, they had a strained marriage. They were as different as possible: Mama – emotional, hot tempered, depressed (like, really), fierce, determined, kept changing everything around…

Ana’s Reason 2.

Series: Under the Surface – Ana’s 13 Reasons Why A series of posts uncovering what is really beneath my anorexia and depression. Reason 1: Genetic Temperament Traits Reason 2: Inheritance. Anyone else think they inherited a lot of who they are from their parents? Maybe hair color, eye color, body shape? For me, I can identify those things and also a few more. Each of my parents had a host of both mental and physical illnesses. As I have explored the whys of Ana, I have to think that my parents passed down at least some of it to me….

It’s not that I don’t want to live…

If you watched last week’s episode of the new show A Million Little Things (you should, it’s great), you heard a character explain this: Of people who jump off the Brooklyn Bridge, only 1% survive. But, 100% of that 1% said they regretted it the moment they jumped. One said, “It’s not that I don’t want to live. It’s that I don’t want to live like this.” YES. That’s it. In January, I was diagnosed with anorexia AND depression. Most of this blog has focused on the anorexia part. It’s more concrete (even though it’s extremely nebulous), more visible, and…

What do you want to read?

Ideas ruminating for posts…what intrigues YOU most to read? Leave yours in the comments! You can’t be brave without being scared My body is an instrument, not an ornament Body Neutral (the new Body Positive) Genes load the gun and environment pulls the trigger I’m not sick enough to write this I AM Jesse’s Girl Fat is not a feeling I have a fear of telling you my fear foods Hi, I’m Peggy and I’m anorexic. (Hi, Peggy.) A spectacular failure Other?  

Ever wonder: what if?

Is there a moment in your life when you think, “If I had said yes, my life might have been totally different”? I wrote a series of essays about my (non) romantic life back in 2006. I’m not sure how much of it I’ll be willing to post, but I’m treating you to the first because it serves a larger purpose in my recovery journey. EPISODE ONE: The One with the Quarterback (1991) It all began in my seventh grade history class where I developed a crush on a blond boy who sat exactly opposite from me. He was the…

How to #jugglealltheballs in 3 simple ways

QOTD: How do you juggle all the balls you have? I have some answers below, but would love to hear your ideas! Alright folks. I took my longest break from writing a blog post since I went public. I didn’t mean to…it’s just…well…I’ve been…well…life went bonkers. So, everything was great (I mean, not really but you know). I was mostly juggling the balls I had, which is an achievement most days. Then my boss (who I adore) told us he was leaving for a new position. Problem: our department is $1m in the hole and not hiring when someone leaves….

Family. Support. Family support.

My aunt and uncle, who I have mentioned here and there, came to visit last week to help us with childcare and support me on this journey. I don’t know how to adequately explain how amazing they are. My dad’s brother and his wife, they told me I was one of theirs the day my dad died. Ten years later, I am closer to them than ever and so grateful that they have included me in their family. My cousins’ (their kids) kids are my only cousins, and therefore, all of LK’s cousins on my side. It’s important to me…